I like to think that I'm not a completely non-civic-minded person. Granted, I don't recycle on a regular basis and I'm not driving a Prius, but when something like a school blood drive comes up, I try to get in on it. Come on--they come to you, they offer snack food, and all you have to do is kick back and be a tad...exsanguinated. Nothing to it, and you might just save a life. It's win-win, really.
And so, when Virginia Blood Services announced that they were coming, I made my reservation and showed up after LR&W this morning. They ran the usual tests--the handy mini-physical and the "Are you sure you don't have Mad Cow or sleep with prostitutes?" questionnaire--and then it was time for the Main Event.
I requested my left arm. Nurse I Don't Want To Be Here poked and prodded, glared at it, then switched to my other arm and repeated the operation. When that produced nothing, she called Nurse Knows What She's Doing, who did her own poking, then shook her head and said, "No way. I'm scared to stick you."
"What's wrong?" I asked, having thought that the iron test would be the major hurdle of the day.
"You have spaghetti veins," she replied, releasing my arm. "And the only vein I could find, the one over here? It's an artery."
Crud.
They recommended I drink a ton of water and come back tomorrow, which isn't going to work. On the way out, Receptionist Nurse told me to take food and a t-shirt. I told her I hadn't actually given any blood, but she said to go ahead, that I could have another tomorrow.
So now I have a t-shirt, a Qdoba coupon, and a "Be Nice To Me, I Gave Blood Today" sticker. Tell me, am I a horrible person because, as I walked away, I began wondering if VBS's promise to provide said goodies could be enforced, and whether there was any consideration to this arrangement?
In other news, most of the dreams I remember are now law school-related. Help.
No comments:
Post a Comment