While my mother and sister looked for breakfast recipes tonight, I came across the 1973 edition of Betty Crocker's Cookbook and found the following two nausea-inducing ideas. The first, from the "Molded Salads" chapter, just sounds wrong:
Lemon-Blue Cheese Ice
Stir 1 pint lemon sherbet to soften. Mix in 2 to 3 tablespoons finely crumbled blue cheese. Place in refrigerator tray. Freeze several hours or until firm.
To serve, spoon onto bibb lettuce; garnish with marinated artichoke hearts.
4 servings.
As I discovered by reading James Lileks' book, molded salads are almost always a bad idea (Triple Orange Ambrosia being the exception to the rule). In this cookbook, however, Betty proves that regular salads can be monstrosities as well. From "First Course Salads":
Celery Victor
1 bunch celery
1 can condensed beef broth
Italian salad dressing
Pimiento strips
Wash celery bunch; trim off root end but do not separate stalks. Remove coarse outer stalks and leaves, reserving leaves for garnish. Cut celery bunch crosswise once so bottom section is 5 inches long. (Refrigerate the top section for use at another time.) Cut bottom section into quarters; tie quarters with string.
Pour broth into skillet; add celery bundles. Cover; heat to boiling and cook about 15 minutes. Drain celery; place in shallow dish. Pour salad dressing over celery. Refrigerate 3 hours, turning bundles once or twice.
To serve, place a bundle cut side down on each plate; remove string. Garnish with pimiento strips and reserved celery leaves.
4 servings.
I only wish I could show you the picture. It's the saddest bunch of beef-and-Italian-dressing-soaked celery topped with pimiento strips I've ever seen.
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