Stupid movie night

Last night, for lack of a better idea, I caved in, got my UK Blockbuster membership card, and rented Farce of the Penguins.

Earlier in the year, I finally saw March of the Penguins, which frankly deserves every honor it received. Bob Saget's spoof, however, will be lucky to get 10% on Rotten Tomatoes.

As the man himself said, it's a movie best seen while high. Not that I've ever been high, but I imagine a little pot (or cannabis, to all you Brits) would have enhanced the viewing experience.

Here's the spoiler: it's roughly 80 minutes of stock footage of penguins, an owl, a fox, a panda, and various mating animals. They're talking, but the mouths don't move. Luckily for Saget and crew, the average layperson can't tell the difference between two Emperor penguins, so they were able to slide with really horrible cuts.

The best part of this film was the cast. Yes, it was amusing to hear Samuel L. Jackson in the Morgan Freeman role. Yes, Carlos Mencia as "Juan Sanchez", the insane Rockhopper, was cute. But what really did it for me - and I only realized this once I saw the credits and the backstage reel - was that no fewer than four Full House cast members were involved in this production: Bob Saget (Danny), John Stamos (Jesse), Lori Loughlin (Becky), and Jodi Sweetin (Stephanie). After being subjected to endless reruns of that horribly saccharine show as a kid (no, Jen, I'm not going to like it more if you sing the theme song again), I laughed to hear them all cursing in penguin guise. So who forgot to invite the Olsens?

That said, even with the cameos, there's a very good reason this dud went straight to DVD.